Today is Earth Day and I’m encouraging all SASSY wo/men to ‘Go Green’. Hence, by using the familiar ethos of “Reduce, Reuse, Recycle”, I’ve come up with a list of simple suggestions to help reduce your carbon footprint, which is the measure of the impact of our activities on the environment in terms of the amount of greenhouse gases produced.

Though this isn’t usually considered a environmental trinity, but I’d like to encourage everyone to Reexamine the way you spend your money. In a perfect world, everyone would earn livable wages, but since we don’t live in one its important to know where and how your money is used once its left your wallet.This may read like a plug, but my primary example is American Apparel, who pays its employees at their Los Angeles based plants approx $12/hour, along with benefits like sick leave, bus passes, and in an effort to reduce the rapidly spreading fog in the area, free bikes and repairs. Just based on the ethical treatment of their employees is enough to make me want to buy all of my casual wear from AA ( however their ‘slim, youthful fit’ + my body shape = bad math.)

In no way am I suggesting that we all become ‘freegans’ and start dumpster-diving in the name of environmentalism. however, if everyone tries to incorporate one new idea per week, gradually we will make a difference in the collective quality of life for ourselves, and most importantly, the future generations of SASSY wo/men.

Between a disgraced Eliot Spitzer ($80K on sex), a boastful David Paterson (affairs and drug use from decades past), the powers that be in our state-capital of Albany are losing sight of what matters the most; effective legislature for its residents. And in light of the various budgets and contracts that are up for renewal – yet are being ignored (including the one that regulates funds for our public schools and paychecks for civil servants like myself), the only person the media seems to be blaming is…Ashley Alezandra Dupre/DiPietro/Youmans, aka ‘Kristin.’

Though I won’t bother to detail the sordid scandal, because that’s what nytimes.com is for, I will state that I was baffled that a recent article provided a link to Dupre’s myspace.com profile. Now, being the owner of a facebook account myself, I more than understand the use of social networking sites as tools of narcissistic exposure, (be it for professional and personal reasons), given today’s Generation Me mentality. And realistically, no one ever grows up and dreams of becoming a prostitute; even Dupre’s page acknowledges her desire to break into the music business. But for whatever reasons, she found herself working as ‘Kristin’ at the Emperors Club VIP. Though she has subsequently been subpoenaed to testify in a Grand Jury investigation of Spitzer, luckily, she’s been granted immunity from being charged herself.

Now maybe I’m just the textbook definition of a bleeding heart liberal, but my heart truly goes out to this girl. She’s been quoted as to have said, “I just don’t want to be thought of as a monster,” and frankly, I think that’s a valid concern. It’s clear that she unwittingly became involved with something that is much larger than her own indiscretions. However, whenever a heterosexual political scandal surfaces, political analysts in the media (like said article) tend to unnecessarily focus on the female counterpart, i.e.; Monica Lewinsky’s blue dress, Anita Hill’s hairstyle, and in this case, Dupre’s de facto profession versus her desired one.

So my question is this; if a 22 year old woman from New Jersey was single-handedly able to bring down the State of New York, an international economic stronghold, then what does this say about the value that we place on adultery? Better yet, is this scandal even about that, or are we more upset by the possible misuse of state funds? And most importantly (to me) who, besides her attorney, is in Dupre’s corner?

-Anairo

A few weeks ago, I found myself at the Bohemia Beer Garden in Astoria, well into my third mug of Pilsner Urquell, for a much needed reunion with Richard, a confidante from my first (of many) colleges that I haven’t seen in over two years. “Hey honey, how ya been? Gimme an update on your life!”

“Well, let’s see; after 4 years of college and 2 years of traveling on theater assignments, I’m now living in my parents’ basement while hustling for cash between internships and freelance work. Oh, and did I mention that I’m also trapped in a long distance relationship with a girlfriend that I adore, but at best is simply adequate?”

To which, with a deep sigh and roll of the eyes, I responded flatly; “Welcome to the Quarter-Life Crisis Club. Your membership card should arrive by mail in 4-6 weeks. Allow me to give you a tour of your life for the next few years…”

Needless to say, Dick’s situation is nothing new.

First coined, at least to my knowledge by John Mayer’s song “Why Georgia”, according to the great bastion of knowledge known as Wikipedia, the Quarter-Life Crisis often strikes the post-college ‘Generation Me’ set somewhere between 21-29 years. If the Mid-Life Crisis is the existential panic over what your life should have been, then the Quarter-Life Crisis is that same panic about what your life will be. Most of this uncertainty can be generalized by a set of questions surrounding;

-My work (Can I find an amazing job that is socially meaningful, pays more than enough, offers great benefits, room to advance and just enough creative freedom?)
-My social life (How do I establish more friendships of the ‘right’ caliber outside of those I already have and possibly settle down with someone?)
-And my career (Do I want to attend law school and defer all of these questions by another three years?)

I used to think that once I got out of college and landed a job, that things would fall into place and I’d automatically enter a world of Cosmopolitans, career stability, and chi-chi apartments, but it seems like adulthood has just stirred up more confusion. And alas, society says that I am too old to run home to mama and ask her to figure things out for me like she used to. Though no one else in my circle, aside from Richard and myself, is openly questioning the direction that their life is headed in, I refuse to believe that we are the only members of the Quarter-Life Crisis Club.

Even more disturbing than this overt denial is the stealthy transition from care-free kid to awkwardly-aware adult. Between the ages of 17-21, life consisted of menial retail jobs and internships during the day, and roaming the City in search of the usual vices (sex, drugs, rock-n-roll, etc) at night. But nowadays, my drugs of choice are Aleve and the only men I’m interested in are Ben & Jerry (or at least the guys who are willing to buy some for me.) I’ve got a job with a pension, a graduate degree in the works, and a mean case of plantar fasciitis that tends to put the kibosh on any wild nights that I might have been planning.

Simply put, I’m too old for that shit.

But I also realize the limitations of my age, and fully admit to being too young/unestablished/insecure/broke to immediately accomplish my goals, i.e. buy property, have children, quit my job to attend the Culinary Institute of America, open my own speakeasy bistro, etc. Hence…the Quarter Life Crisis. I used to look towards my older 20-something friends for guidance, however I’m starting to realize that they, too are fumbling through this thing called life (albeit, with a bit more grace.) I wish there was some sort of 12-step plan to deal with this existential disconnect that I could share with everyone, but the truth is, it’s unavoidable. So here are three tips on what I’ve learned thus far from personal experience:

1. Grow Up
Just because you’re of drinking age does not mean you have to prove it every weekend; there are other forms of recreational fun outside of ‘models-n-bottles’ night at the club, or football night at the pub. Try cultivating interests outside of your comfort zone; maybe you’ve always been interested in learning a new language, or picking up a hobby. Who knows; you might meet great people along the way who share your interests.

2. Get Help
Maybe it’s a fear of little people (aka midgets), a penchant for picking the wrong mate, or something much deeper concerning an unresolved childhood drama, but we are all a lil bit crazy. However, within the minority community, there’s a general suspicion of talking to a therapist/psychologist, for fear of ‘becoming dependant on unnatural drugs’ or ‘airing our dirty laundry.’ Well get over it. Even if your form of therapy does not involve psychotropic medications, sometimes talking to a neutral professional can make a world of difference.

3. Gain Stability
And by stability, I mean funds. I’m not a financial expert, but there are many studies that prove how most people (including myself) are only three months away from living in basic poverty, or at least moving back in with your parents. That being said, SAVE, SAVE, SAVE!!! Or at least look into a Roth IRA/401k/403b plan that will automatically do it for you.

I’m not saying that I’ve found the absolute solution, but when supplemented by the occasional cold beer with good friends like Richard, these steps can make the transition into independent adulthood a lot smoother. And until I am living my ideal life of a married restaurateur with 2.5 kids and a home in the Poconos, I’ll take whatever I can get.

-Anairo