No I’m not gonna go Howard Stern on her, but I think she’s a perfect example of what I want to talk about. First off, I love her confidence. It’s not easy no matter the size, but for her to be that size in Hollywood and still have her self esteem (and sanity) in check is amazing. But we must be for real, she is not healthy and we should not encourage her to stay this size.
The other day on twitter someone joked about how it’s the time for someone to talk to Gabby about her weight and not even 5 minutes later someone else tweeted “big girls rule, leave Gabby alone.” Now I know this isn’t going to be popular, but we’ve got to stop. If Gabby does not lose (a substantial amount of weight now), she might not make it to 50. It’s just not healthy and we shouldn’t encourage this. I’m not saying turn on her, say bad things, think negative thoughts. I’m not hating on Gabby. I’m saying, we need to encourage her to do better. We need to not make excuses for her not to lose weight. At this point, she can afford better food, she can afford the gym, she can afford a trainer, she could even afford surgery if she wanted to go that route, so all these wack excuses you’re getting ready to throw at me are moot.
This post is not about bashing “big girls” or hurting their self esteem. This post is a plea for us to stop encouraging each other to stay large. I get why we say “big girls rule” and other affirmations. And I think it’s great that we encourage people to feel good about themselves no mater the size, but we have got to stop making excuses for our size.
Facts:
- African American women have higher rates of obesity than women of other races
- Black people were 50% less likely to engage in exercise than White people in 2007
- People that are overweight are more likely to suffer from high blood pressure and other risk factors of heart disease (which is the #1 leading cause of death for African American women).
Collectively we need to lose weight. I’m not saying try to become a size 2, I’m saying be healthy. If you’re already fit, great. Now go out and help your mom, your sister or your best friend get in shape too. Losing weight and eating healthy are not easy, but they are definitely feasible. With some motivation, discipline and support, we can do it.
peace,
e.
{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }
I don’t understand how and why Gabby’s weight or body is up for public discussion on what she should do with it? Have we all rallied together to tell other celebrities who are killing their bodies with drugs? There are celebrities who smoke, do we get together and find a way to tell them to quit? Losing weight has very little to do with food/exercise. Thus, by focusing on someone’s body and trying to make them self-conscious will never help. Again, Gabby doesn’t have to lose weight. Isn’t it more important that she is happy and is a good person?
Yes, it’s important that she is happy and is a good person, it’s also important that she stay alive and be healthy. While we may not agree on whether or not her weight should be public discussion, the fact of the matter is that she needs to lose weight. The point of the post is not to rally around Gabby and make her lose weight, I was using her as an example. In fact, your comment perfectly sums up what I’m writing about. We need to stop encouraging each other to stay large, it’s not helping anyone. But not encouraging each other to stay large is not the same as tearing someone down and destroying their self esteem.
Thanks for the comment Amelia.
Hi Eva,
Thank you for the response. =) I think as a society we don’t understand weight loss and obesity correctly. As someone has lost weight (almost 120lbs) recently, the conversation becomes too much about eat right (!), go to a gym(!), and get thinner(!). I just get really bothered when I see women’s bodies being used as a vehicle to talk about an issue in larger society. Gabby is a person, and a person with feelings. To use her as the poster child of everything that is wrong with our eating habits in America, and not as a good role model for young woman who want to follow their dreams seems silly to me. I would only encourage the people who want to lose weight to lose it. I know from personal experience telling someone to lose weight because they may DIE, does not motivate them. I mean, there are many other things that could cause her to die. Right?
ok Amelia, you bring up excellent points. As someone who is losing weight (although not as much as you – congrats!), it’s not simply eat right and go to the gym, but that’s the bulk of it, no? Again, I’m not using Gabby as the poster child of everything that is wrong with our eating habits, she’s just the person who’s been brought up a lot recently, she could be Kristie Alley or anyone else. And you’re right, me saying “you might die” is not the best motivator that I can come up with, but at the end of the day that’s the truth. And while yes, Gabby or anyone else for that matter, can die of many other things, this is preventable. We might have to agree to disagree on this, but when you are this young and that large, you need to make some changes. Now if she *wants* to lose weight is an entirely different conversation.
This definitely is an important issue, and I think the issue is a little less about weight than it is about lifestyle and choices. We all know “skinny” women who eat nothing but junk food and don’t work out as well as women who are simply larger. Ideally it would be great for ALL of us to vow to make wiser decisions, which include being more active overall, incorporating a healthier diet, etc. Then collectively we can become healthier without any one group in particular feeling attacked…or maybe I’m living in a dream world :-/
If I’ll be honest with myself and you all, even though I’ve always been physically small, I know that I can make healthier decisions. And to continue being honest I don’t want to go the gym, but I do think that increasing other activities like walking, dancing, playing sports etc is a step in the right direction. And honestly I like eating way too much to cut things out of my “diet” BUT adding lots of fruits and veggies into my everyday food plan is a step that I can live with. It doesn’t always have to be drastic or torturous to be healthy. It may not always be easy, but it’s definitely doable.
I would love to see “The Biggest Loser – Celebrities” version… how awesome would that be?
And the “health-o-meter” goes both ways… there are lots of conversations about the unhealthy lives that celebrities lead re: smoking, drinking, drugs, anorexia (see Sober House, Celebrity Rehab, Intervention, or the cover of any tabloid magazine for example). Lindsey Lohan is constantly attacked in the media for being a coked out/meth-head anorexic. Lara Flynn Boyle stopped getting work because she was so skinny… ditto to Portia de Rossi (who ended up getting more work once she gained weight) & Calista Flockheart. Megan Fox was told to gain 15lbs to do Transformers 2, while Angelina Jolie had to gain 20lbs to do Tomb Raider.
As for Gabby – like Eva said, it’s not about “getting skinny” it’s about being healthy. Did anyone notice that Mo’Nique lost a huge amount of weight? She said she did it because she wanted to be healthy for herself and for her family.
I do think that there’s a psychological component to healthy living (and healthy weight loss/weight gain) that’s all too often neglected. These are issues that needed to be discussed, talked & coached through. Education also needs to be involved… understanding “why” we eat the way we do is really important. I tell folks that the formula is tricky = 40% working out, 60% eating right, and 100% mental.
And granted, people who are not “ready” to be healthy can’t be pushed into being healthy with threats of “you might die.” A person has to be prepared. But once you see a loved one die from obesity-related causes… it kind of changes your perspective of what you should/shouldn’t be doing. I’d say the same thing to a thin person with poor eating habits who suffered a heart attack or was anorexic… or to someone who routinely smoked crack or cigarettes.
So ultimately, I’m with Eva here – we have got to toughen up and get healthy – if not for our sake then for the sake of our friends, family, and loved ones.
Thank you Miss Journey and Anon, you both bought up really good points about how this convo could go the other way – the too skinny chicks. To be honest, in real life I don’t see many Black women battling this so it didn’t even cross my mind *shame face*.
Anon, I think the closet we’ll get to celebrity biggest loser is celebrity fit club, and they never get fit, prop b/c they don’t exercise nearly as much as the people on biggest loser.
And I think Anon. hit it on the head, people will do things when they’re ready. So maybe I should refocus my energies on helping people get ready instead of trying to scare them into it.
thanks!
I think all of us have good intentions in getting those we love and care about healthier.
Celebrities are told to lose/gain weight by their employers, but not their supporters. They do it for their own financial gain. Lindsey Lohan stopped getting work because she stopped showing up to work, not because of her weight loss. Many of those celebrities on the rehab reality tv shows are not working and have reached rock bottom. Gabourey Sidibe is famous now, despite her weight.
I just know as someone who was much larger that adding veggies to my diet and hitting up the gym a few times a week was not what made me lose weight. There are underlying issues to why many people overeat at that rate. Instead of telling the ones we love that they should go to the gym, it might help to just love them unconditionally. Bringing up their “health issues,” will never work. It really just always comes down to the individual making the decisions they wish to make.
Everyone has brought up great points. I am pleased to be a part of an important national discussion.
I think most people have made it clear that they are proud of Sidibe’s achievements and that they think her positive attitude makes her a delight to watch…at least I have.
I recognize that there 2 ends of the spectrum, but I’m addressing one:
There are different factors here so we should separate them.
There’s a factor that has to do with self esteem because our society portrays slim women as the desired type. For that reason i understand why some people get irritated when other people seem to gloss over all the fantastic things about person-X and decide to talk about the fact that person-X is obese and doesn’t fit a certain mould.
Then there’s the component that involves a national out-cry for people to be healthier…one that expresses outrage at:
(a) people dying from diet/lifestyle-related disease, (b) a goverment that doesn’t closely regulate the “food” aka nutritionally-worthless-and-dangerous-substances, that make it to the shelves, (c) the fact that some companies can use the human population as test subjects and get away with it. Basically: preventable deaths. I don’t think about it as a scare tactic. It pisses me off. It should piss everyone off.
I agree that people have to come to some realization of why it is important TO THEM to be healthy and then on their own decide to BECOME healthy. I disagree that putting health issues on blast is not a good strategy. It’s not about instilling fear. It’s not about belittling people. It’s not implying that they are loved less because they are obese. It’s about awareness.
Let’s not say because there’s often a strong emotional component associated with weight gain/loss, we should sugar-coat things to boost self-esteem.
Everyone needs to hear over and over again why being obese is not okay- because it’s not okay.