Hey Everyone in SASSY land! Just wanted to give y’all an update on how the challenge was going…
I’M TIRED Y’ALL!!
I knew that going on 8 dates with 8 different guys was going to be tiring and that it was going to take a lot of effort on my part. But I am beat. Just plain tired. I go out just about every night (even on weeknights) in an attempt to meet people. My laundry is stacking up quicker since I’m changing clothes more often than normal. And despite my efforts, I still haven’t met anyone.
Well let me rephrase that: I haven’t met anyone that I could see myself spending an hour of my time with. I’m open to giving people chances, but some folks out here are on that foolishness. For example, I went out to a bar to watch the college basketball National Championship game. I’m relaxing, watching the game, and sipping on my beer, when my waitress comes over to me:
Waitress: That guy over there in the hat sent this over to you.
What did he send me you ask? A cup of water. With a lemon wedge.
Umm…
Now this could be seen as a kind gesture. He didn’t want me to get dehydrated. Maybe somehow he knew that I hadn’t had my 8 glasses of water that day. How considerate. But what really took the cake was the note written on a napkin that came with the water:
“Y so lonely? Text me at 555-555-LAME”
I couldn’t take this seriously At all.
I’m not giving up just yet, but I am starting to get slightly frustrated. I need some advice on how to meet more guys. Someone out there have any tips for me? A tried and true method? A referral? Until next time…
Love (and a nap) is all we need,
Sasha
{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }
LOL – Dude tried to pull you with that ‘recession special’!
Advice: Think of things YOU like doing, places YOU like going, and check for some of those guys. Every guy doesn’t excel in those environments. I know I don’t. I’m FAR more likely to get at a girl who’s in a sports bar rooting for her favorite team, than I am a chick at a club, doin’ the ‘Stanky Leg’.
I’m mad about the alleged phone number dude gave you…he’s “lame” for sending you a glass of water…and if you thought you were alone, then why didn’t he offer to be your company? Such a loser.
Nevertheless, you’re in a large city–so I would go to professional events, i.e. those sponsored by “foundations”, “organizations”, not those put on by promoters, i.e. club parties. We already know the selection is limited in the club.
Also, you’d be surprised who you’d meet in an upscale department store, i.e. Bloomingdales, Saks, Neiman Marcus…try that one of these weekends–trust me, they are out there! I’ve been quite surprised on my trips to the aforementioned on the weekend! I would say the grocery store, but that seems to only happen in the movies. lol.
I know this isn’t always a good idea, but have you had any referrals from friends as to potential prospects?
I would add Whole Foods to the list of upscale places. I’ve seen a lot of cute men in suits there and in Borders too.
*I meant if “he” thought you were alone.
I agree with the tips about department stores and bookstores.
I would also add happy hours as an alternative to the club scene: a) your options are from a pool of working men b) happy hours really are happy, whether because it’s the first release from a hectic work day or it’s the drink specials
Hope this helps!
Sending some energy and laundry doing fairies your way…Good luck!
Thanks everyone for the tips!
Just-US: So far no referrals, but I think I have one or two in the works…
Restaurant bars near hospitals, law firms, commercial real estate companies. For instance, in ATL we have buckhead which is the ‘upscale’ section of the city. It’s peppered with black people and not so cliche. You may grab a gal pal and meet up for one drink, one club soda/cranberry and an apetizer between 6 and 8 pm. Who knows what you may find. Unfortunately ATL doesn’t offer true happy hour with drink specials – but you can definitely make life what you want it to be.
Aw. Hang in there. That is just ignorant. I wish somebody would send me over a cup of water. Geez. I would honestly tell you that it’s true when they say it happens when you are not looking and least expect it. When I was single, I lived in a place where it was hard to meet like-minded people – let alone men. The friends and work associates that I had were flakes. I was definitely about to give up on expecting more. Then one morning (divine intervention, lol) I woke up and decided that I was going to bring sexy back. I switched my look up a little bit, flats to low heels (nothing outrageous), made an effort with makeup – etc. I saw and ad in the local paper about entries for a Sexy Singles feature that was starting. I entered and was accepted to be interviewed for the feature. My co-workers thought I was CRAZY! It was pretty out of character. I started going to anything that interested ME. Wine tastings, new restaurant openings, art exhibits, whatever. Most of the time, I went alone. I even heard about these meetups happening locally where boat owners were having cocktail parties at the dock (I was talked out of that one by friends convinced I’d be kidnapped and taken offshore
. I accepted dinner invitations from anyone that seemed sensible and didn’t feel obliged to go on a second date if I didn’t want to. I did this for almost 2 months. During that time, I met my husband. It my mindset (wide open for possibility) that attracted him. Our first “date” he flew me to MD and we took the train to NYC. It was opposite of that I would have done in the past and it worked for me. Switch it up. Do everything that sparks your interest to meet interesting PEOPLE, not a MAN, and you will get where you want to be. I swear by it. Your time is coming.